Archive for My Life After An Affair

Feb
22

Rebuilding Trust After an Affair

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DSRwithSP_AlbumEpisode #9 of The Anatomy of an Affair with Steve Peck and David Feder is about how couples can continue the process of rebuilding trust after an affair when they are faced with a particular challenge such as a business conference, or a business trip.

building-trust-concept-370x229In the example discussed, David talks about a situation where the spouse who had an affair has to attend a 3-day business conference where the “affair” partner will be present.  Steve Peck and David Feder have an interesting and dynamic discussion about how a couple can go about planning for the conference in such a way that addresses the needs of the hurt partner and the participating partner.

DaveFeder-Headshot

David Feder

David Feder cites Tessa Bonhomme (former player on Canada’s Women’s National Hockey Team) who said, “For me it’s being a part of something bigger than yourself”.  David says Tessa Bonhomme’s quote applies to relationships and in particular to rebuilding trust after a betrayal.  Listen in to learn how.

For more information on David Feder, visit: www.MyLifeAfterAnAffair.com.  For more programs related to divorce and life after divorce, visit: www.DivorceSourceRadio.com.  Send any questions or comments you might have to DivorceSourceRadio@gmail.com.

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Jan
28

The Other Man or Woman in an Affair

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SteveOnDSRalbum4In episode #8 of The Anatomy of an Affair with David Feder, we take a look at the “other” man or woman who became involved with your partner.

How could another woman or man become involved with someone who was a relationship with someone else who had potentially been married for years and with children? 

affair_2_1This show helps us to better understand what the person who was involved in the affair and potentially breaking apart a family was thinking.  How could they knowingly become involved in this situation?  Perhaps they were being misled by the person in the relationship telling them their marriage really wasn’t working and that they were planning on getting divorced. 

And what if you’re having an affair and decide to divorce and be with your affair partner only to discover that months or a few years later the person you left your family for decides they no longer want to be with you?  And if someone entered into an affair with you what are the chances that they might leave you for yet another affair?

For more information on David Feder, visit: www.MyLifeAfterAnAffair.com.  For more programs related to divorce and life after divorce, visit: www.DivorceSourceRadio.com.  Send any questions or comments you might have to DivorceSourceRadio@gmail.com.

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Dec
04

Being Alone for The Holidays

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David Feder on affairsThe Anatomy of An Affair series with David Feder continues with Being Alone for The Holidays in Episode #7.

For many the significance of the Holiday Season is a combination of religious significance, gift-giving and reconnecting with friends and family.  But after an affair, what once seemed easy is now more complicated.  What is the right kind of gift to buy and what message do I want to give are now questions that need to be considered?  While we once looked forward to spending time together this year we worry about how to manage the awkwardness that may exist.

alone-at-christmasAnd what about the kids, don’t they deserve to have a good Holiday Season?  This is the time of year when some anticipate the arrival of Santa Claus, they look forward to spending time with parents, extended family and friends and they wonder whether the gift they so desire will be waiting for them.

How you spend time is not an all or nothing proposition and it is often best to give each other permission to have some alone time apart from one another.  Of course this requires trust that the partner who cheated is not going to use that their alone time to visit with their affair partner.  If this is still a concern then spending time together may not be a good idea and you should reconsider whether spending any time together during the holiday season is a good idea.

David offers advise and hope in this episode or The Anatomy of An Affair.   For more on David, visit: www.MyLifeAfterAnAffair.com.  Make the best of your holidays.  We wish you the best.  For more programs on divorce and life after divorce, visit www.DivorceSourceRadio.com.

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Jul
31

The Anatomy of An Affair – Part 6

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Transformation from a Participating Partner to a Successful Rebuilder

affairDavid Feder on affairsIn this episode David Feder focuses on the PARTICIPATING PARTNER and the guidelines the person who cheated MUST follow in order to become a SUCCESSFUL REBUILDER.

The difference between the IMPOSTER who says he or she wants to heal and the PARTICIPATING PARTNER who doesn’t just talk but is willing to WALK THE TALK is committing to a series of guidelines that makes recovery possible.

In this episode we discuss:

  • Do lie detector tests work and should they be used
  • How to help your spouse heal from an affair
  • How to become a successful relationship REBUILDER

For more on David Feder, visit: www.MyLifeAfterAn Affair.com.

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Apr
17

The Anatomy of An Affair – Part 5

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David Feder on affairsPart 5 of our series, The Anatomy of An Affair continues with David Feder.

Listener note: This is Part 4 of this series, and if you are finding this program through our archive directory, iTunes or Stitcher Radio, it is advised you begin with program 1 and follow the podcasts in their original order.

Affairs, divorceIn this episode, David answers questions on might have if they have been involved in an affair such as:

•    Should I agree to therapy with my partner if he hasn’t ended his affair yet?
•    What is the best way to end my affair with my Affair Partner?
•    How do I make my partner feel safe when he/she pushes me away.  It’s frustrating and I am feeling hopeless.  I can’t seem to do anything right.
•    How do I rebuild trust after an affair?  Are there steps to follow?
•    What about sex after an affair?  I don’t feel like it but I’m afraid if I say no, it will be my fault that my partner goes back to his Affair Partner?
•    What is Forgiveness?
•    Should I tell my children about the affair?
•    Affairs in the workplace – What do I do if you both work at the same company?

For more on David Feder, visit: www.MyLifeAfterAn Affair.com.

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Mar
18

The Anatomy of An Affair – Part 3

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David Feder on affairsIn this the 3rd segment of our series, The Anatomy of an Affair, we focus on two aspects of recovery.  David Feder believes strongly that moving “from discovery to recovery” means much more than merely moving on and allowing time to pass.  David says, “if you do that you are leaving the quality of your recovery and your life up to the Gods”.  He asks, are you sure that that is what you want to do?

img_cheating_spouseIn this segment we begin by discussing what should be considered when making the decision of whether staying together and rebuilding your relationship should even be considered.  If not, we review  the other option of focusing your recovery on yourself and on becoming the best version of yourself that you can be.

This segment also reviews some of the more common reactions people have once learning of an affair, and we provide tips to take care of your health during this difficult time.  The early stage of recovery is a critical time in which you and your partner are at your most vulnerable and this should be taken seriously.  Safety is of course paramount.

Regardless of whether the affair that is impacting your life surfaced recently or whether you have known about it for some time, you will benefit from the constructive and important information included in this segment.

For more on David Feder, visit: www.MyLifeAfterAn Affair.com.

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Mar
06

The Anatomy of An Affair – Part 2

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David Feder on affairsThis is Part Two of The Anatomy of An Affair, a series of programs taking a closer look at infidelity. Our guide throughout the series is David Feder, founder of My Life After an Affair.

David Feder

David Feder

David has a passion for helping people recover from the trauma of infidelity and his practice is dedicated to accomplishing just that. As David says, “everyone will recover from infidelity…the question is HOW?”

In Part 2 of this series, David addresses putting your world back together after someone cheated, regardless of whether you had the affair or you were hurt by it requires a VISION of where you want to go and how you are going to get there. David explains his 6-step recovery process named VISION, a path that if followed, leads to a full recovery and a better future.”

Listener note: This is Part 2 of this series, and if you are finding this program through our archive directory, iTunes or Stitcher Radio, it is advised you begin with program 1 and follow the podcasts in their original order.

For more on David Feder, visit: http://MyLifeAfterAnAffair.com

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Feb
27

The Anatomy of An Affair – Part 1

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Hormone Replacement Therapy on Divorce Source Radio with Dr. Edward LichtenThis podcast begins a series of programs taking a closer look at infidelity.  Our guide throughout the series is David Feder, founder of My Life After an Affair.

David has a passion for helping people recover from the trauma of infidelity and his practice is dedicated to accomplishing just that.  As David says, “everyone will recover from infidelity….the question is HOW?”

affairs and infidelity with David Feder on Divorce Source RadioListener note: This is Part 1 of this series, and if you are finding this program through our archive directory, iTunes or Stitcher Radio, it is advised you begin with program 1 and follow the podcasts in their original order.

This series will look:

  • How affairs begin
  • Sexual versus emotional affairs
  • The role sex addiction place in affairs
  • Should you admit to an affair?
  • How to rebuild trust after an affair
  • The recovery process
  • and much more.

For more on David Feder, visit: http://MyLifeAfterAnAffair.com

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